Breaking (The Bank): Kucinich to Vote Yes on Health Care

>> March 17, 2010

Dennis Kucinich today flip-flopped his no vote on Health Care Reform. Changing a No to a trembling Yes, he announced the decision in what can only be described as a strange, disjointed news conference at the base of the passenger stair this morning after being taken for a ride in Air Force One.

The President, First lady and several unidentified, purple shirted attendants, went for a  2 to 3 hour grueling flight aboard the Presidents jet where the congress-critter was forced to watch home movies of Obama's wedding to Michelle and their recent vacation trip to Hawaii. The final straw, as told by anonymous sources, was when Michelle brought in some fresh baked cookies she had prepared especially for the arm twisting trip sight-seeing tour. At last, Kucinich finally succumbed to the overpowering pressure brought o bear.

"I just couldn?t take it anymore. I'm sorry America, but you weren't on that plane. You just don?t know! You weren't on that plane!" Kucinich was heard screaming as he, struggling, was led down the stairway.

Broken, obviously shaken and in shock by the ordeal, Kucinich was carried away by paramilitary paramedic personnel, presumably to an undisclosed hospital for mental evaluation and treatment.

Regrettably for Kucinich, Obama-Care has apparently found its first victem patient.

More as details become available.

This is MNR reporter iRoomba, on the tarmac at Dulles AFB for MNR News and The Resistance.

Thank you iRoomba. A fine job you're doing for us there. As some of you know iRoomba was on the ground in Chile after the earthquake and brought us coverage from the devastation there after Chile's government unleashed the terrible earthquake in order to deter a visit from Secretary of State Clinton.

5 comments:

Teresa March 17, 2010 at 5:17 PM  

I wonder what bribes or favors Obama promised to Kucinich? The man is a friggin weasel. He's an extremely weak man. I can see in my crystal ball that come next election Kucinich is going to need a new job.

Longhaired Conservative March 17, 2010 at 8:12 PM  

Obummer probably told him he'd throw him out of the plane if he didn't vote for it. Either that or threatened him with Michelle's cooking.

I hope he's going to be looking for a new job. How are his poll numbers in Ohio?

Matt March 17, 2010 at 8:43 PM  

I think the threatened to have Rahm "poke" him.

Longhaired Conservative March 17, 2010 at 8:49 PM  

lol He shoots, he scores! Good one.

The_Kid March 17, 2010 at 9:57 PM  

Matt, good one.

Robot, Well done. Probably hit the crybaby right on the head.

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